Castle Of Love!

“I want this teddy”.

She clung on to it, and shouted again – “I want this teddy, or else I am not going home”

To her mother, she seemed a little kid having her way, but to the people around, she came off as one of those spoiled child who has to be taught a lesson, if not their thinking, the look on the people’s faces in the toy store gave away a lot.

Children are known to have mood swings very often, and this one was no exception, just when her mother was about to pay for the teddy her daughter clung on to, she exclaimed, letting the teddy which was being squeezed by her arms drop to the floor, “I want that one”, this one has only a little fur. The frown on the cashier, and other people in the store, went unnoticed as the mother without any sign of anger, picked up the new teddy and handed it to her daughter, who welcomed it warmly into her arms.

“She’ll grow up into a devil if you pamper her like this” said the girl’s grandmother.

“I am sure she will have her reasons”, said the girl’s mother, drawing pride from the glimpse of the girl talking to the teddy.

“By this age, most of the girls learn music, do household chores and are accountable to their parents”, snapped back the grandmother.

“Everyone is different, and my little angel is different in her own way, she need not be accountable to what she does, to anyone, but, I am, to her in every way – she is my pride.”

Later that night, seated at the dining table, the girl started throwing tantrums. At first it seemed funny and cute, soon it turned agonisingly irritating. She started throwing food in to her mother’s plate and ordered to be served again. Her mother did as she ordered, without of slightest sign of irritation.

“I am full; I need ice-cream amma”, declared the little girl. The tantrums seemed to come all the time, all through day till night on every single day!

“You little jerk, eat your food first”, frowned the girl’s grandmother, as she watched the girl’s mother make her way to the refrigerator and get the ice-cream for the girl.

A little less than 2-3 spoons, the girl got down the large chair which engulfed her and disappeared in to her room and came back holding the teddy which made her look small, her face covered with the hugeness of  it. She set it on the large chair and said, “He is going to eat the rest of the ice-cream”.

The mother overjoyed by the cuteness of her daughter, drew her closer and planted a kiss on her forehead, and cuddled her. The girl broke free from her mother’s embrace and embraced the teddy. Her mother was a little jealous, but, her emotions were often unnoticed. And, she didn’t expect an 8-yr old to fathom her emotions.

She was in building a castle in mud, when a lady usually a victim to her stubborn tantrums walked up to her.

“What is that you building?” you little devil.

“Not bothering to look who it was, she said, “It is for my mom and me”.

“And, why is that?”

“Because, she takes care of me all the time, puts up with the tantrums I throw which she alone was not accountable for, until God decided play a little game with her.

By this time, her mother was already aside the lady the girl was responding to. And, the she noticed the perplexed expression on the lady’s face to the girl’s latest remark.

“Her father left us, a couple of years ago, not giving us the liberty to question him. I do not like the way she looks, or she behaves. She wants to be pampered all the time and I do not have the time to put up with this thing,” 

And, you know what my daughter said? “I’ll take care of amma, I’ll make her happy and take her to places”  Those words, though unclear, from my daughter mouth, at that time elevated all the pain I was put through, it took away all the fears. The lady noticed the pride in the mother’s voice.

“I cannot be disloyal to her, by doing only my share of upbringing. We both, my husband and I were liable to her and, I am more than happy to fill his empty shoes, she’ll get the pampering and love of both of us, she is the my princess and I’ll raise her like one, with that she picked up the girl in to her arms, who was sitting next to the castle of mud looking at her mother, her arms held up.

Atop the castle lay a small piece of paper, tethered to a twig, which read “Castle of Love”.

Realization!

  

On his way home, he stopped at the market to buy flowers for his mom and just like every other Friday he dismissed the thought and headed home. He saw his mother at the door waiting for his arrival. He noticed the sigh of relief on her face and asked himself, “When would she change?”

“Where have you been? Was there too much traffic?” her mother asked just like every other day curiosity looming all over her. 

“I cannot be home early every day”, he snapped and disappeared into his room, leaving her stranded at the door. She walked back to the kitchen and resumed what she was doing - preparing his favorite dish.

He knew he had been selfish all his life, he knew he didn’t give back the affection, love and at least few moments to cherish to people who loved him the most. Even worse, he never let this realization take over him at any point in his life, for he knew he would then be weak and like most of the humans be dependent on someone and that would haunt him every single day, till the day either of them gives up on someone and he was too stubborn to go through that ordeal. He soon realized he would then be on the receiving end, on the end where his mother and sister currently were and no one better than him knew what it was like to return unrewarded from there.

“Do you like the curry?” his mother asked at dinner, eager for a bout of affection.

“Seems fine to me” he said, not being too rude.

“Can you not be a little more affectionate and subtle while replying to her?” demanded his sister sitting next to him.

“I just did” he snapped got up from his chair, and declared “I am full” and disappeared into his room, letting the bowl full of his favorite dish - the Halwa go unnoticed!

One day, his sister came home from school exhilarated and her smile which he admired the most, but never revealed it to her etched from ear to ear. 

“What’s the matter sweet pea?” inquired her mother.

“I secured the First rank in the class and was awarded the best student in the school”, she said smiling letting most of the words go blur.

He didn’t react to her exhilaration, instead he said “That is not a big deal, go to your room and complete your homework”. 

Her mother noticed the smile on her face fading and gave a look of admonishment to her son, who without acknowledging either of the reactions continued reading the book he has clung on to since morning.

Later that night, he checked in on his sister who was busy reciting a poem from her book. He noticed her head go back and forth and her eyes darted on the empty wall and her little fingers counting the number of times she had recited a single poem. 

“Here you go, this is for you”, he said. Not letting his happiness exploit his facial muscles. It was her favorite book of cartoons and a Mickey Mouse toy which he promised to buy her on her birthday a year ago. 

He could see her face beaming and the smile etching on her face from ear to ear. 

“Thank You Bhaiyya, love you!” she said jumping excitedly on the bed and hugging him. 

He responded back perplexed, by hugging her like never before, a drop of tear rolling down his cheek and a smile that brightened his face. 

Earlier that evening, he was in his room and when he overheard his mother talking to his sister.

“You know what, bhaiyya loves you a lot and he wants you to carry the same ranks and grades in the following year, so wants you to work hard and not be overjoyed by this result, okay?”

“He could have said that too, why be so rude?” she said sobbing.

 

“It is for your own good and he is not rude, he is a little stressed”, she said reassuringly. 

“He is on leave for the past 3 days, from what is he getting stressed?” she demanded in a way that made her mom give up on the conversation. There was no point in making her daughter understand her sons behavior, which even she failed decipher all her life and had been a victim of.

The next Friday, he stopped at the market, only this time, he bought the fresh roses his mom loved and a box of chocolates his sister devoured and headed home. 

Unlike everyday for the past 2 years, he didn’t see his mother at the door. His face turned red and his selfishness took over him, he thought the change he wished for came too quickly, came before he had his chance of atoning his sins. By the time he reached the door, his mother came out, worry written all over her face, which disappeared at the mere sight of her son, and she let the same sigh of relief.

And, at that moment he shed all his inhibitions, the fears which he dreaded. He never told why he was like this, why he was harsh and afraid to love back until that evening when he did, after briefly crying on his mother shoulder while hugging her.

Later that evening, he joined her mother and sister in preparing the dinner, he exclaimed that this was the best food had ever tasted. He noticed the beaming faces of his mother and sister and their smiles, he then realized what they had been missing, and surprised that it was so little of what he did that made them love him more than ever, and in that realization lay a happiness he had not known earlier!